room without doors

The First.

2009-11-08T07:39:10Z

I ran around my house in this after I was done sewing and decided it needed help because...

Bro: Wah...pregnant ah?
Mum: Ya, giving birth soon. You don't know?

(it's genuinely in the genes!)

and it's so big and loose like PJs.

As the saying goes,

or so I made up,

a belt can change your life,

or that of your dress.

***

Have an awesome Sunday, fellow Gnomes!
(oh yes, I just dyed my hair and got those bangs.)

Turn the page.

2009-11-03T13:59:28Z

It's like a photograph you see on the magazine,
so unbearable,
so blinding,
so painful to the eyes,
you just need to turn the page.

That's exactly what I need to do about us right now.

The Lazier Times.

2009-11-01T11:44:42Z

This weekend has been quiet,
in a nice way.

Good music
Snuggling under my sheets
Countless stoning moments
Flipping through old magazines

Haven't had all these in so many months.

p.s. I have stayed in my room for more than 24 hours.
p.p.s. Will you buy me Korg Kaossilator?

This is for us.

2009-10-31T01:44:04Z

"This is a tribute to the nice girls. To the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more. Who spend hours fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions because it must be that they are doing something wrong. This is for the girls who don’t give up on the first date, who don’t want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and supportive audience for a story they’ve heard a thousand times. This is for the girls who understand that they aren’t perfect and that the guys they’re interested in aren’t either, for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch because somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe, just maybe this time he’ll have understood. This is a homage to the girls who laugh out loud and often, who are comfortable in skirts and sweats and combat boots, who care more then they should for guys who don’t deserve their attention. This is for the girls who have been in the trenches, who have watched other girls time and time again fake up and make up and fuck up the guys in their lives without saying a word. This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from “there are plenty of fish in the sea” to “time heals all wounds.” This is to honor those girls who know that guys are just as scared as they are, who know that they deserve better, who are seeking to find it."

- via TigerInTheDark

HELLO WIND.

2009-10-24T16:21:31Z

You have slightly less than 7 more days to get your costume ready!

Taiwanese Dramas

2009-10-24T12:25:35Z

From the legendary "爱" (Taiwanese Serial Drama that is already airing on Channel U and will still be for the next 4 years, I heard),

Woman: You will get retribution!

*cues a you-watch-out tune*

---
Hahaha, I mean, that's such a cheap way to buy fright from the audience.

Ending with anger.

2009-10-24T03:34:35Z

I feel it coming back to me.
This familiar anger, the unexplainable anger,
wells up inside me.
And I think
that's how things end all the time.

Back then,
right now,
this same anger surfaces and I know it.

It calls for an end.
An end to everything.

It's about time.
I'm quitting you as a habit.

If only...

2009-10-22T16:05:10Z

"Tell her you think shes cool. Tell her why you think shes so cool. Smell her hair. Talk to her in movie theatres. Pick her up and pretend youre going to throw her in the river; shell scream and fight you but secretly, shell love it. Hold her hand and skip. Hold her hand and run. Just hold her hand. Pick flowers from other peoples gardens and give them to her. Tell her she looks pretty. Let her pay for stuff if she wants to. Introduce her to your friends as The coolest girl I know. Sit in the park and talk to her. Take her to the library, and playgrounds, and train stations. Tell her dirty jokes. Tell her stupid jokes. Write poems about her. Just walk around with her. Throw pebbles at her window at night. When she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her. Take her to shows of bands shes never heard of. Hold her hand in the mosh pit. Let her fall asleep in your arms. Call her. Call her back if she calls you. Sing to her, no matter how bad you are. Carve your names into a tree. Get her mad, then kiss her. Give her piggy-back rides. Go see her band play even if they really suck, and tell her they were great. Give her space if she needs it. Push her on swings. Stay up with her all night when shes sick. Make up pet names for her, but cool ones, not sappy ones. Teach her guitar. Lend her your cds. Write on her. Make her mixtapes. Write her letters. If she asks you to go to a show with her, go, even if it means a 5 hour train trip. Take her to cool shops, and let her take you to even cooler ones. Listen to all the bands she mentions. Dont tell her that her favorite bands suck. When shes sad, hang out with her or stay on the phone with her, even if shes not saying anything. Buy her ice cream. Let her take all the photos of you she wants. Look into her eyes. Slow dance with her, even if the music is fast. Kiss her in the rain.When you fall in love with her, tell her. <3"

---
That would be perfect, for now.

p.s. Thanks Tong for this!

Will those ever burst?

2009-10-19T13:26:13Z

p.s. The "will" came out a little ugly. Oh well, treat it like it's bolded folks. Tell me how you like it or not.

Can I Be Be Your Love?

2009-10-16T16:14:36Z

"Everybody's talking how I can't can't be your love,
but I want want want to be your love,
want to be your love,
for real..."

- Rachael Yamagata's Be Be Your Love

---

These few lines have been looping in my head for days.

No, Don't Try Me.

2009-10-15T15:20:46Z

Please don't try me.

Mummy is cute lah.

2009-10-14T23:58:24Z

Mum: Mao mao~
Me: Huh?
Mum: This is my mao mao. *shows her Magiclean furry duster thing*
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Passion.

2009-10-14T15:55:06Z

I don't know. It took me a long time to come up with an answer.
I have too many passions.
But then again, are they just interests or passion?

I'm too afraid to say I haven't found my passion.
Maybe.

But right now,
Words and Creation
are what I'm willing to dedicate my life to.

They should be able to last.
Must.

The One Thing That Touched Me Today

2009-10-11T15:25:48Z

I never knew
that when my friends discuss among themselves
a time they would be free to visit me for lunch,
it would move me so much.

Can I?

2009-10-06T15:42:47Z

Things To Be Done

Laze around at home
Sew, sew, sew
Take awesome random photos
Listen to my favourite songs
Think about nothing
Worry about nothing

Something inside.

2009-10-04T06:27:50Z

There is a timed gadget
stuck somewhere inside me.

Every Sunday,
after 12,
it will be activated.
This gadget is so powerful,
it eats into my soul, my mind,
reminding me constantly
it's Monday tomorrow.

I'm dying a little inside every Sunday.

How long more can I hold on to this feeling?
I don't know.

I just know if I hold on any longer,
I'll probably be a very unhappy person.

Dread.

Fucked up.

2009-09-30T16:36:54Z

I truly believe
I don't deserve this from you.

If you want me to assist you with something,
shouldn't you be nice to me?
At least feign it somehow.
It's not as if you are the one who's paying me to do all this.

No explanation to begin with.
And me being me, I will not ask.
I will just go with my instinct, doing things in the most logical way to me.
I like it to figure things out on my own,
and I will ask when I need to.

But I have to admit,
your reply is indeed mind-blowing.

It made me think,
how can anyone possess such minimal IQ and EQ at the same time?
I mean, don't you question yourself about your existence in this world?

Well,
it isn't coming from you only.
I can feel it. I just didn't bother to work on it.
No point, really.

Just because I dress way more funky than you
Just because I am way younger than you are
Just because I am new to all this,
it doesn't give you a reason to treat me this way.

You will never get it, even if it has been explained in detail, word by word.
I feel sorry for your stupidity, really.

You are just another reminder to me
that I shall not grow into an adult like you,
an inhuman, heartless, dumbfounded asshole like you.

nincompoopsie @ 2009-09-27T23:47:00

2009-09-27T16:25:46Z

"Some arrive tired after they get hired."

The way how things are constantly finding its way to communicate to me is spooking me out a little.
What's going on?

---
The weekend is ending and I'm depressed.
Come back soon, weekend!

Always Be My Frankie

2009-09-21T02:07:12Z

"There's something in the air at the moment... Something a little bit frisky, a little bit scary. Full of opportunity and whimsy. Or at the very least, a chance to fall on your arse and come back up smiling.

Over the past couple of months I've had a friend quit his consultant job to start his own record label. Another who was a writer has decided to brew beer full-time. One has gone from corporate training to running a craft market. Two doctor friends are travelling the world for 12 months. An a mate who was a civil servant has chucked in her pay cheque to start a PhD studying Aboriginal rock 'n' roll.

It can't just be me. It can't just be my friends. With economic fuckery shifting the ground under our feet, I wonder if we've all slipped on our metaphorical rollerskates and decided to move with it. If we've twigged that pursuing your passion might not be a pipedream. That it's never too late to change direction. Or, as one of my mates put it, "If you're gonna get paid a shit wage anyway, you may as well be doing something you love."

Words to live by, don't you think?

Love, Jo xx"

- Frankie Issue 31 (Editor's Note)

-----

I love how the things I'm reading are constantly speaking to me,
or so I imagine them to be.

nincompoopsie @ 2009-09-18T00:26:00

2009-09-17T16:26:56Z

Let's Fly A Kite, originally uploaded by LiBing Chong.

IT'S FRIDAY!
Crafty crafty weekend coming up :)

The one who started everything...

2009-09-16T15:27:54Z

If you're in the industry (whichever, really) long enough,
you would be very familiar with the use of email and its content between you and the receiver.

And I think,
this fierce, selfish and ambiguous way of communication
has begun because of someone.

Someone who is very selfish,
someone who only thinks for himself/herself,
someone who believes in the dog-eats-dog cycle,
someone who finds joy in the whole sneaky business.

And because of this someone,
everyone starts to do the same.
Everyone puts on their guard.
Too much for their own good.

What you get out of this
is a society so apathetic to humanity,
so suffocating,
so childish.

Thank you, Someone.

Make it work!

2009-09-14T15:05:12Z

I'm going to make it work.
Watch me.

---

p.s. Damien Rice and Lisa Hannigan are my heroes for now. Jeff Buckley too.

nincompoopsie @ 2009-09-09T01:07:00

2009-09-08T16:54:26Z

What if what you want isn't what you want anymore?

Responsibilities.

2009-08-24T13:13:10Z

If only responsibility comes with willingness as a package (always)...

Alain de Botton and I shall (try to) be friends.

2009-08-22T03:11:30Z

"How much of what I felt for Chloe had been influenced by songs like these? Was my sense of being in love not just the result of living in a particular cultural epoch? Was it not society, rather than any authentic urge, that was motivating me to pride myself on romantic love? In previous cultures and ages, would I not have been taught to ignore my feelings for Chloe in the way I was now taught to ignore (more or less) that impulse to wear stockings or to respond to insult with a challenge to a duel?"

- Alain de Botton in Essays In Love

and that could simply be put into this:

"Some people would never have fallen in love if they had never heard of love."

- Francois de La Rochefoucauld (also found in the book, Essays In Love by Alain de Botton)

---
So I wasn't the only one who's agreeable on this.
See.